How do I see?

Whoa! I was going to continue my heart pour of emotions, but two things happened, no three. First my cousin, the one I love dearly, felt I was just not being nice. She wondered, which would have been okay if she kept it to herself, why I was intent on making people with no one making any ado over them with love, miserable. Ouch! That hurt seriously, but she is my beloved. Secondly, P (do you always have to wonder who this is?) forgave me my error (Thank you). And thirdly, I chanced upon a blog, The Struggling Christian, and it 'pinged' in my heart, again, that sometimes it is not all about us; me, in this case.

I guess that really is the reason this season is celebrated, but then we all have taken it so personal that all we think about is 'how much value am I going to get out of this relationship?' Why do we not ask anymore 'what am I going to give to this relationship to make sure it does not become a drag?' 

Just last night I was blackberry chatting with my brother, who had found himself in a tight spot due to no fault of his, and I had tried to say it to him be calm, but it came out 'be matured'. Well he insisted I had insulted him. I was like mister this is what I was trying to pass across and I asked him to help me know how it was that the simple words had translated to an insult. 'Forget' he said. Well I dropped the issue because I am not very good with being tactful with my words, or actions. But then I realized that even though my intentions were noble, the expression was the exact opposite. Now what if it had been someone else with a lot less understanding of the person who I was? All I would have succeeded in doing would be to alienate that person, rather than providing succour, the original intention.

So now, much more than I had previously done, I have to stay in the place of continuous empathy. I do not think that alone this would be easy or achievable, but then I have a support system that encourages me to be all that I can; including seeing life not just from my end of the telescope.

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I pause so you can go take in some of what she has to say. This is a most unsolicited gesture from me; I don’t even know who she is. I got carried away by the bluntness of the stories which didn’t take away the message she wanted to pass across.

Thank you for reading and I hope you look forward to a lovely weekend...